Summer Thunderstorm

You're like a summer thunderstorm;
unexpected and arousing.
I just want to dance in you
cause you're the rain in me.
You make me breathe in deep.
You're the lightning bolt
that makes me scared to sleep.
You're the thundering clouds
that make me scream out loud;
oh, you're the one for me.
Summer thunderstorms pound and pound.
They suck the power out
and you fall asleep to their sound.

Never Better

Born into sin,
never worthy
of anything.
Always trying to be better
and climbing the ladder.
Joining social causes
the more the better
the better I get.
Trying to earn back
what I can never repay.
I don’t understand
why does nothing change?
I never feel worth it
always feeling empty.
There’s not enough inside of me.
I give and give
trying to feel better about myself.
I try to be better,
but I’m broken and bleeding
and helpless and scared.
Beat down on my knees
realizing I am nothing.
I can’t do it on my own.
Being better won’t save me.
You came when I was nothing.
You found me when I was hiding.
Your grace found me just as I am;
broken, bleeding, unworthy, never better. 

Aftereffect

He came when no one was watching
no one was expecting him.

She was so calm and kind; the epitome of 
actions always speak louder than words.
And the cardinal was her favorite bird
it seemed to be pinned to her every shirt.
Her smile came less often but when it came it lit up her eyes.

He didn’t knock on their door 
only sirens announced his entrance minutes before.
He’s a killer; 
mocker of words
and destroyer of health.
He takes what isn’t his 
and he delights in it. 
He comes in through roofs 
leaving the chimney for your Santa; 
the only hopes and dreams you have for that split second.
Everything you have is threatened.

Sitting in the bathroom, 
clinging to your poodle in the tub, 
not knowing that those will soon be the only things you own.

He still haunted her months later, taking her breath with the arm of a chair….

Goodbye Sleep

How do I sleep when there's nothing to feel
I'm numb
Like icee hot
If that makes you numb
I don't know
Maybe I'll find out in my 9th life
Feeling tired isn't an option in a grave
Where all you do is toss and turn
Footprints in the mud
Cover the last words of those that you thought loved you
Goodbye to that numb world
It is better to be dead

Secret Place

I keep all of your love letters
in my secret little box
in my secret little place
where I can go when you’re not around.
There, I can miss you when no one’s watching.
Only those letters see
every tear that falls
and stains those perfect characters
that you wrote by hand,
the ones I treasure.
It’s almost like you’re there with me,
in my secret place.
Because only you see me
when I’m hiding,
when my mask is off
and the tears are falling.